How to Leave an Abusive Drug Addict
Leaving an abusive drug addict is the same as leaving any other abusive relationship.
You are in physical danger and if there are children in the home, they are too. Abuse often escalates into fatalities and you need to think first of immediate physical safety and go from there.
Whether the abuse if due to someone prone to violence, being drunk or on drugs is really not the immediate issue, safety is. It is highly unlikely the person is going to change unless he seeks therapy and even then, it does not happen overnight.
Leaving someone you love is hard, but when it comes to abuse, it is the only way.
Go to a shelter or to family members you trust. Get into therapy yourself, you will need it. For one thing, you will be having feelings of guilt even though you have nothing to feel guilty about. Still, victims of domestic violence often feel as if they provoked their partner or deserved it for some reason.
Yes, you love your partner, but you are not helping him, yourself or the children by enabling him. Stand up, leave. Do it for all of you, including him. Maybe it is the wake-up call he needs to get help. He certainly didn’t attempt to stop before you left, right?
* Leaving an abusive drug addict is the only way to help him.
Try to pack a few things if you can while he is at work or asleep. Slip out the door, even if it is just with the clothes on your back and the children. Put safety first. If you need to call in-law enforcement, do so but most people love the addict and feel like they just can’t. So if you feel that strongly it’s fine, but LEAVE.
* The most important thing to remember?
Do not return to the home before the abusive drug addict has gotten into a program. Leaving someone you love is hard, but when it comes to abuse, it is the only way any of you are going to really be able to get help. If children are involved, you have a responsibility to them first regarding their safety and often abuse does escalate and get directed to the children. Even if they are never physically touched, the psychological abuse is there in seeing you get hit. Even if the abusive drug addict is only verbally abusive, the psychological scars are forming on all of you.
Do not apologize for leaving.
10 Responses to “How to Leave an Abusive Drug Addict”
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[...] possible and if you haven’t already, you need tell the addict how much his addiction is affecting you and bothers you. Tell him that for his own sake, he needs to get help. Do this on a daily basis. [...]
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@Jin
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